Page:Edward Prime-Stevenson - The Intersexes.djvu/183

 birthday came, and I took the notion to ask him to spend it with me. But four days before it, my father died, and so that invitation never was given. It was, in fact, only thus that Eduard and I remained separated. Once he accompanied me from Aurich to my home in the country near by, at Westerfeld. When I left East-Friesland, a year later, he wrote a page in my album. I cared more for that page than for all the others. After our parting, I liked well merely to think of him. When I had exercises in "letter-writing" in school, I preferred to begin them. "Dear Eduard!" I could not find any other name so beautiful."

"Why was all this? I did not know. A feeling that I had never known before had come over me. Later this sort of sentiment grew to passion, but not more inwardly such. Eduard d' H—'s very features, only little weakened by time, still unforgotten, are ever in my mind. I shall never forget him" …

Of a further development of his uranianistie sentiment, the same homosexual autobiographist writes thus:

"I was fifteen years, ten-and-a-half months old, when the first nocturnal signs announced my entrance into manhood. There had never been any sexual occurence, either uranistic or other, till then. The incident mentioned was quite normal. But much earlier had awakened in me certain gentle longings, partly indefinite, an objectless glow. At this same period however, such feelings were separated, never aroused by one and the same young man. These sensuous though "objectless" flashes of feeling often had troubled me in my lonely hours. There was no use in fighting them. They first became changed to the following actual aspects when I was past fourteen, and was a student in Detmold. An architectonic supplement to the plates in Normand's "Orders of Architectural