Page:Early Reminiscences.djvu/287

 1852-1856 231 was in the doleful dumps about it, when he was swooped down upon by a Scottish woman, Margaret Ireland, much as a vulture comes down on a drooping camel and picks out its eyes. She set to work to prey on his despondent spirits, and to convert him to Calvinistic Predestination, and succeeded in completely picking out his eyes of common sense. He married her, though a woman of no beauty, but of considerable force of character. She managed so completely to convert him, that he sold his commission, went to Cambridge, and studied for Orders. My grandfather was very angry, and refused to help him. However, he succeeded, for he was resolute. He was much fondled by the Evangelical party, and had a pick of such livings as had Puritans for their patrons. At one time he had a church at Ellacombe, by Torquay, and later one at Winchester. In late life both he and his wife greatly softened, and even ventured to perpetrate puns, and laugh over them. It was a step out of the Puritanic slough, but a very small one. When my sister and I were at Wolverhampton, one rainy day, we had a romp, racing one another round the dining-table. We were prayed for especially in the evening, before the domestics, that we might be delivered from the spirit of levity that had taken hold of us. I had brought with me a Shakespeare, but its possession gave such offence, that at my uncle's particular request I kept it locked up in my portmanteau. This was after my cousin, my uncle's only child, had seen me reading " Macbeth," and had reported the fact to his mother, who said, " When sinners entice thee, consent not unto them." She told her husband, and he reprimanded me. I was talking one day with my uncle on Church service, when he said to me : " I rather approve of the Morning and Evening Prayers, as they sober and prepare the soul for the sermon." " Good heavens ! " I exclaimed. " I do not view their relative positions in that light. We go to church to worship God. That is the substance. As for the sermon, it is a hors d'oeuvre, as at a dinner ; like sardines on toast, we can do without it, or we may take it as an adjunct, but as nothing more." He didn't like it. But I think that on the subsequent Sunday the idea of sardines on toast was on his mind, as he did not preach