Page:Diary of ten years.djvu/17

 THE VOYAGE.

,

with sleeplessness and agitation, I threw myself into my berth soon after you and my dear father left me, still indulging a hope of seeing you on board once more before sailing. On awaking from long and painful slumber, disturbed by a confusion of all imaginable noises, I found that a steamer had taken us out of the harbour in the course of the night, and that we were at a considerable distance from land. The reflection then crossed me, that I was for the first time separated from my family and friends, "Quæro alio patriam sub sole jacentem;" and placed as it were, alone on the ocean of life to steer my own way, and depend on my single efforts, without the friendly hand of the dear parent, who had hitherto been my guide and companion–the "custos incorruptissimus"–without the interchange of fraternal love, and with the heavy responsibility of having embarked four others in my service and speculations, for whose welfare of mind and body I feel myself accountable; under all these anxious thoughts and considerations, I prayed to God, the only source of calmness and of comfort, to strengthen and support me.

To vary the usual monotony and dulness of the long and