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DIAMONDS TO SIT ON

littered with sausage-skins was on the window-siU. The divan by the wall was covered with newspapers. A few dusty books stood on a small shelf, some photo­ graphs of cats were hanging on the walls, and in the middle of the room stood the walnut chair. Each piece of furniture in the room, including the chair, had a large red seal fastened to it, but Hippolyte did not pay any attention to this. He immediately forgot aU about the criminal code, he forgot Bender’s instructions, and moved rapidly towards the chair. At that moment the newspapers on the divan began to move. Hippolyte was terrified. The papers slid down on to the floor and a kitten quietly came out from under them. It looked indifferently at Hippolyte and began to wash its face with its paw. ‘ WeU, I’m bothered ! ’ said Hippolyte as he dragged the chair towards the door, but the door opened before he could reach it and the owner of the room stood on the threshold. He had on an overcoat and a pair of mauve pants, and was carrying his trousers in one hand. It could quite safely be said that there was not another man hke Absalom Vladimirovich Iznurenkov in the whole of Russia. The Republic valued his services, for he was most useful to it, and yet he was practically unknown, although in his art he was as great a master as Chaliapin in singing, Gorky in litera­ ture, or Capablanca in chess. Chaliapin was singing, Gorky was writing a long novel, Capablanca was getting ready to meet Alekhine, and Absalom Iznuren­ kov was busy making jokes. He made jokes for humorous newspapers. Famous men usually make two good jokes in a lifetime, which increase their fame and in course of time become ancient history ; but Iznurenkov invented at least sixty first-class jokes in a month, and these were repeated with a smile by every one. But he still remained unknown, for his name never appeared under his own jokes.