Page:Curious history on several occasions.pdf/2



S it is the preſent cuſtom in this city with pregnant girls, to give the production of their illicit amours to half a dozen different fathers at leaſt, in order to furnish kirk-treaſures a ſcope of choice, who generally give a diciſion in favour of him who has the heavieſt purſe: So I, in imitation of ſo laudible an example, once intended to dedicate my Brat, to a whole groupe of Patrons and to allow the Public to point out from amongſt them, the perſon moſt deſerving the intended honour.

Upon this plan I conſulted the much renowned Ninth of Diamonds, and by a letter requeſted permiſſion to place his name on the front of my little book, to the following purport. 'Sir. being inſtantly to publiſh the ſecond number of my Miſcellanies, I am adviſed to dedicate the ſame to you: I hope your modeſty will kindly accept of the intended honour, and that you will be a friend both to the Author and his publication. I am, Sir, With respect and Eſteem, Your devoted." &c

To my Epiſtle, he returned by my youngeſt Claudicle the following verbal anſwer, with emotions of rage. "Tell your father Claudero, that if he dares to uſe my name, I will proſecute him to death" Proſecute! Said I Is the man mad? Does he weigh the value of the compliments I intended him? And muſt his incomparable virtues die with himſelf thro' his curſed modeſty? Hang modeſty! I am reſolved that neither proſecutions, jails or even gibbets ſhall divert me from the glorious taſk Immortal he ſhall be as the Miſcellanies of Claudero.

Great Sir, you are the Phoenix of this our age, the darling of Caledon; and your valour at Glaſſmuir, was only to be marched by Sir John Cope, your heroic General. Let the ſong on that occaſion vouch