Page:Comical tricks of Lothian Tom (6).pdf/23

 just now, and send out your lad to-morrow and perhaps we'll agree, was all that passed. So Tom went home with his ten pounds and paid his rent. Early next morning the fleshers came to Tom's house for the calf, and every one called for his calf, but Tom had only one to serve them all. Now, says Tom, whoever will give most, and speediest shall have it, I will put it to a roup. What, says one of them, my master bought it yesterday. Then, said Tom, you would be a great fool to buy it to-day, for it is fashious to lead and heavy to carry.

Two country carters, passing the entrance to the Arcade, Argyll St., Glasgow, observed painted on the wall, “No Dogs to enter here." "No Dogs to enter here!” exclaimed one of them, “ I'm sure there's nae use for that there.” “What way, Jock." replied the other. “'Cause dogs canna read signs," said he. “Ha, Ha, Jock, ye're may be wrang, I'se warran ye gentle folk's dogs 'ill hen't brawley, for there's schools, noo, whar they learn the dumb baith to read an' speak."