Page:Comical tricks of Lothian Tom (3).pdf/20

 20           money to purchase for him, until he had got about thirty pounds of her money and then she would delay the marriage no           longer. Tom then took the old woman and girl aside, and made the following apology. Madam, said he, I am very willing to wed with my dear Polly, for she appears as an angel in my eyes, but I am sorry, very sorry to acquaint you that I am not a fit match for her. What child, says the old woman, there is not a fitter match in the whole world for my           Polly, I did not think your country coulg afford such a clever youth, as what I hear of you to be, you shall neither want gold nor silver, nor a good horse to ride upon and when I die, you shall have my all. O but, says Tom, Madam, that's not the thing, the stop is this; When I was in Scotland, I got a stroke from a hor- se's foot, on the bottom of the belly, which has quite disabled me below, that I cannot perform a husband's duty in bed. Then the old woman clapt her hands and fell a crying, O! if it had been any im- pediment but that, but that, but that wo           fu' that! which gold and silver cannot pur- chase, and yet the poorest people, that is           common beggars, have plenty of it. The old wife & her daughter sat crying and wringing their hands, and Tom stood