Page:Comical sayings of Pady from Cork (1).pdf/14

 14 The Comical Sayings worth the waiting on, ſo ſhe would go and ſea what good things is in the world to come; and fa when that old rover called the Fever, came raging like a madman over the whole kingdom knocking the people on the head with deadly blows ſhe weri away and died out of ſpite, leaving me with nothing but two motherleſs children, Tom. O but, Pady you ought to have gone to e doctor, and got ſome pills and phyſic for her. Teag. By ſhaint Patrick I had as good a pill o my or as ane doctor in the kingdom could give her, and as for ſneeſhing, the could never uſe inut nor tobacco in herſelf, Tom. O you fool that is not what I mean; you ought to have brought the doctor to fell her pulle and let her blood if he thought it needful. "Teag. Yes, yes, that's what I did; for I ran to the door whenever ſhe died, and fought ſomething for a dead or dying woman; the old fooliſh d- was at is dinner, and began to aſk me ſome dirt queſtions, which I anſwered diſtinctly. Tom. And what did he aſk Pady? Teag. Why, he aſked me, How did my wife to fool to which I anſwered, the fame way tha other women go to chair: no, ſaid he, that's nd what I mean, how does he purge Arra Mr Doctor ſſaid, all the fire in purgatory won't purge he clean for ſhe has both a cold and a linking breath Sir, ſaid he, that is not what I aſk you, whethol does the ſh-t thick or thin, Arra, maſter docto ſaid I, it is ſometimes ſo thick and hard that yes may take it in your hand, and eat it like a piece chceſe or pudding, and at other times you may drink it, or ſup it with a ſpoon. At this he flt in a moſt terrible rage, and kicked me down ſtai and would give me nothing to her, but calle me a dirty ſcoundral, for the ſpeaking of ſh-t b fore ladies,