Page:Comical sayings of Pady from Cork, with his coat button'd behind (1).pdf/16

 16 PADY FROM CORK

Teg. Ay ay drown'd, as clean drown'd as a ſide, for the ſea blew very loud, and the wind ran ſo high, that we were all caſt away ſafe on ſhore, and not one of us drown'd at all.

Tom. And where did you go when you came on ſhore.

Teag. Arra, dear honey, I was not able to go any where you might caſt a knot on my belly, I was ſo hollow in the middle: So I went unto a gentleman's houſe and told them the bad fortune I had of being drown'd between Ireland and the foot of the garden, where we came all ſafe on ſhore. But all the comfort I got from him was a word of truth.

Tom. And what was that, Pady.

Teag. Why he told me, if I had been a good boy at home, I need not to have gone ſo far to push my fortune with an empty pocket; to which I anſwered, and what ſignifies that, as long as I as a good work man a no trade at all.

Tom. I ſuppoſe Pady the gentleman would make you dine with him.

Teag. I really thought I was when I ſaw them toaſting and ſkining to many black chickens, which was nothing but a few dead crows they were going to eat: ho, ho, ſaid I them is but dry meat at the beſt, of all the fowls that flies, command me to the wing of an ox, but all that came to my ſhare, was a peace of a boiled herring and a roaſted potatoe, that was the firſt bit of meat I ever ate in England.

Tom. Well Pady what, buſineſs did you follow after in England when you was ſo poor?

Teag. What ſir do you imagine! was ſo poor when I came over on ſuch an honourable occaſion as to lift, and bring myſelf to no perferment at all. As I was an able bodied man in the face, I thought to be made a brigadeer, a grenadeer, or a fuzzleer, or even one of them blue gowns that holds the firy ſtick to the bung hole of the big cannons, when they let them off to fright away the French; I was as ſure as no man alive, ere I came from Cork, the leaſt preferment I could get, was to be riding maſter to a regiment of marince, or one of the black horſe inſelf.