Page:Comical sayings of Paddy from Cork (5).pdf/8

 Tom. Why did you not leave him when he uſed you ſo badly ? Teag. Arra, dear ſhoy, I could never think to leave him while I could eat, he gave me ſo many good victuals, and promiſed to prefer me to be his own bone-picker. But by ſhaint Patrick, I had to run away with my life or all was done, elſe I had loft my dear ſhoy and body, too by him, and then I came home much poorer than I went away. The great big bitch dog, which was my maſter's beſt beloved, put his head into a pitcher to lick out ſome milk, and when it was in he could not get it out and to I ſave the pitcher, got the hatchet and cut off the dog's head, and then I had to break the pitcher to get out the head; by this I loft both the dog and the pitcher. My maſter hearing of this, ſwore he would cut the head off me, for the poor dog was made uſeleſs, and could not ſee to follow any body, for want of his eyes. And when I heard of this, I ran away with my own head, for if I had wanted it, I had loſt my eyes too, then I could not have ſeen the road to Port Patrick, through Glen-nap; but, by ſhaint Patrick, I came home alive in ſpite of them. Tom. O rarely done, Pady, you behaved like a man; but what is the reaſon that you Iriſh people ſwear always by ſhaint Patrick ? Teag Arra; dear honey, he was the beſt ſaint in the world, the father of all good people in the kingdom, he has a great kindneſs for an Iriſhman, when he hears them calling on his name Tom. But, Pady, is ſhaint Patrick yet alive? Teag. Arra, dear honey, I don't know whether he be dead or alive, but it is a long time ſince they kill'd him; the people turn'd all heathens, but he would not change his profeſſion, and was going to run the country with it, and for taking the goſpel away to England, ſo the barbarous tories of Dublin cutted off his lead; and he ſwimmed over to England, and carried his head in his teeth.