Page:Comical sayings of Paddy from Cork (1).pdf/8

 Tom. Why did you not leave him when he used you so badly?

Teag. Arra, dear shoy, I could never think to leave him while I could eat, he gave me so many good victuals, and promised to prefer me to be his own bone-picker. But by shant Patrick, I had to run away with my life or all was done, else I had lost my dear shoul, and body too by him, and then come home much poorer than I went away. The great big bitch dog, which was my master's best beloved, put his head into a pitcher to lick out some milk, and when it was in lie could not get it out and I to save the pitcher got the hatchet and cut off the dog's head, and then I had to break the pitcher to get out the head; by this I lost both the dog and the pitcher. My master hearing of this swore he would cut the head of me, for the poor dog was made useless, and could not see to follow any body for want of his eyes. And when I heard of this, I ran away with my own head, for if I had wanted it I had lost my eyes too, then I would not have seen the road to Port-Patrick, through Glen-nap; but by shant Patrick I came home alive in spitə of them.

Tom. O rarely done, Paddy you behaved like a man! but what is the reason that you Irish people swear always by shant Patrick?

Teag. Arra dear honey, he was the best shant in the world, the father of all good people in the kingdom, he has a great kindness for an Irishman, when he hears him calling on his name.

Tom. But Paddy, is saint Patrick yet alive?

Teag. Arra dear honey, I don't know whether he be dead or alive, but it is a long time since they killed him; the people all turned heathens, but he would not change his profession and was going to run the country with it, and for taking the gospel away to England, so the barbarous tories of Dublin cuttet off his head; and he swimmed over to England, and carried his head in his teeth.