Page:Comical sayings of Paddy from Cork (1).pdf/4

 Teag. Why sir, I was no business at all, but what do you call the green tree that's like a whin bush, people makes a thing to sweep the house of it?

Tom. O yes, Paddy they call it the broom.

Teag. Ay, ay, you have it, I was a gentleman's broom, only waited on his horses, and washed the dishes for the cook; and when my master rode a-hunting, I went behind with the dogs.

Tom. O yes, Paddy, it was the groom you mean. But I fancy you was cook’s-mate, or kitchen-boy.

Teag. No, no, it was the broom that I was, and if I had staid there till now, I might have been advanced as high as my master, for the ladies loved me so well that they laughed at me.

Tom. They might admire you for a fool

Teag. What, sir, do you imagine that I am not a fool? no, no, my master asked counsel of me in all his matters, and I always gave him a reason for every thing: I told him one morning, that he went too soon to the hunting, that the hares were not got out of their beds, and neither the barking of horns nor the blowing of dogs could make them rise, it was such a cold morning that night; so they all ran away that we catched, when we did not see them. Then my master told my words to many gentlemen that were at dinner with him, and they admired me for want of judgment, for my head was all of a lump; adding, they were going a-fishing along with my master and me in the afternoon; but I told them that it was a very unhappy thing for any man to go a-hunting in the morning, and a fishing in the afternoon: they would try it, but they had better staid at home, for it came on a most terrible fine night of south-west rain, and even down wind; so the fishes got all below the water to keep them dry from the shower, and we catched them all but got none.

Tom. How long did you serve that gentleman Paddy

Teng. Arra, dear honey, I was with him six weeks, and he beat me seven.