Page:Comical sayings of Paddy from Cork (1).pdf/23

 the river Sticks, to catch fishes for shaint Patrick's table, and them that is owing the priests money, is put in the black-hole, and then given to the hands of a great black bitch of a devil, which is keeped for a hangman, who whips them up and down the smoky dungeon every morning for six months.

Tom. And where does your good people go when they are separated from the bad

Teag. And where would you have them to go but unto shaint Patrick's palace, and then they may go down the back stairs into the garden of Eden, now called Paradise.

Tom. Well Paddy, are you to do as much justice to a Protestant as a Papist?

Teag. O my dear shoy, the most justice we are commanded to do a Protestant, is to whip and torment them until they confess themselves in the Romish faith; and then cut their throats that they may die believers.

Tom. What business do you follow after at present?

Teag. Arra, dear shoy, I am a mountain sailor, and my supplication is as follows.

O GOOD Christian people, behold a man who has com'd through a world of wonders, a hell full of hardships, dangers by sea and dangers by land, and yet I am alive; you may see my hand crooked like a hen's foot, and that it is no wonder at all considering my sufferings and sorrows. Oh oh! oh! good people. I was a man in my time who had plenty of gold, plenty of the silver, plenty of the clothes, plenty of the butter, beer, beef, and biscuit. And now I have nothing; being taken by the Turks and relieved by the Spaniards, lay sixty-six days at the siege of Gibralter, got nothing to eat but sea wreck and raw mussels; put to sea for our safety, cast on the Barbarian coast, among the wicked Algerines, where we were taken and tied with tugs and tadders,