Page:Carroll - Notes by an Oxford Chiel.djvu/128

24 and that two medical certificatesbut I will be calm. The deed is done. Let us change the subject. Even now a great musical performance is going on within. Wilt hear it? The Chapter give itha, ha! They give it!

Sir, I will very gladly be their guest.

Then, guest, you have not guessed all! You shall be bled, Sir, ere you go! 'Tis love, 'tis love, that makes the hat go round! Stand and deliver! Vivat Regina! No money returned!

How mean you, Sir?

I said, Sir, 'No money returned!'

And I said, Sir, How mean'

Sir, I am with you. You have heard of Bishops' Charges? Sir, what are Bishops to Chapters? Oh, it goes to my heart to see these quaint devices! First, sixpence for use of a doorscraper. Then, fivepence for right of choosing by which archway to approach the door. Then, a poor threepence for turning of the handle. Then, a shilling a head for admission, and half-a-crown for every two-headed man. Now this, Sir, is manifestly unjust: for you are to note that the double of a shilling

I do surmise, Sir, that the case is rare.