Page:Calvary mirbeau.djvu/185

Rh "Ah! dear, dear! . . . I thought you would never come back! . . . Five days, just think of it! . . . Next time if you have to go again I want to go with you."

She appeared so affectionate, so truly moved, her caresses gave me such confidence, and then the burden on my soul was so heavy, that I did not hesitate to tell her everything. I took her in my arms and put her on my lap.

"Listen to me, my Juliette," I said to her, "listen to me! . . . I am lost. . . ruined. . . ruined. . . do you hear, ruined! . . . We have only four thousand francs left! . . ."

"Poor boy!" Juliette sighed while placing her head on my shoulder, "poor boy! . . ."

I burst out sobbing, and cried out:

"You understand now that I must leave you. . . . And I am going to die if I do!"

"Come now, you are silly to talk that way. . . . Do you believe I could live without you, my dear? . . . Come now, don't cry, don't grieve so much. . . ."

She dried the tears from my eyes and continued in her voice which grew sweeter with every word.

"First of all we have four thousand francs. . . . We can live four months on that. . . . During these four months you'll work. . . . Let us see if you can't write a good novel in four months! . . . But don't cry, because if you cry, I won't tell you a great secret. . . a great, great secret. . . . Do you know what your little wifie did, who little suspected that herself—do you know? . . . Well, for three days she went to the riding school, she took lessons in horsemanship—and next year when she is well trained, Franconi will engage her. . . . Do you know what. a woman rider in a fashionable riding school makes. . . . Two thousand, three thousand francs a month! . . You see