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 his servant came up to the spot. "Who murdered this poor man?" said the gentleman, "We three Highlandmen," answered the eldest of the brothers, (thinking the gentleman enquired who they were.) "What could induce you to commit so horrid a crime?" continued the gentlemongentleman [sic]. "The Purse and the Penny Siller," replied the second of the travellers. "You shall be hanged, you miscreants!"—"And our just right too!" returned the third. The poor men were thus brought to the gallows on their own evidence, and presumption of guilt.

An aged man, named Thomas Wood, sitting on a high three-footed stool in the gallery of the Old Church of Falkirk, during divine service happened to fall asleep, tumbled on the floor with a great noise. The preacher stopped and demanded the reason of the noise. "Nothing, Sir," cries a wag, "but a lump of Old Wood fallen down."

A female pauper lately made a very strong and forcible appeal to the elders and heritors of a certain parish, for an advance of 4s 6d.—Some one of the grave quorum enquired what made her so urgent on this occasion, when she had lately got a supply of coals, shoes, &c., to this she replied— "Why, deed, sirs, it's just to buy a pair o' corsets to my daughter Tibbie, ilk lass that's ocht respectable has them but hersel', so ye see she canna do wantin' them, an' ye maun e'en let me ha't sirs."