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 BILL THE MINDER the clapping of hands, as well as the soothing music of the harmoniums, only made them more disagreeable and spiteful.

But far worse was to happen when Bill presently carried off the great cup for remaining shut up in a bathing-machine with twelve vaccinated children for twelve hours. Then they quite lost their tempers, and Bill very nearly lost his life. At least seven babies were hurled at him, as well as the cup and the bathing-machine, and Bill was only saved by the seven mothers of the seven hurled babies, who rushed forward to grapple with the hurlers, and carried Bill and the babies out of their reach.

This shocking disturbance caused the vicar and his eight kind curates to faint, while the Duke, who, now having lost all interest in the proceedings, was only waiting to give away the prizes, turned quite white, and at once drove off with the Duchess in his motor, and never again referred to the subject. The general stripped off his medals in despair, and gave them away to the children to cut their teeth with. The chatty old Viscount became dumb with astonishment, and the twelve bishops, with heads erect and half-closed eyes, walked off to their cathedrals. The harmoniums were all put out of tune and quite spoilt by the efforts of the bandsmen to drown the noise, and the tournament was completely broken up.

After this, as might have been foreseen, no mother would entrust the care of her children to any one but 12