Page:Awful memorial of the state of Francis Spira (1).pdf/20

[20] yet by little and little I decay and consume.- My ſervants would fain preserve this my weary life, but at length the will of God must be done, and I ſhall perish miserably, as I deserve!- Rejoice, ye righteous, in the Lord!-Blessed are you whose hearts the Lord hath mollified!- Then, after ſome pause, he went on.

I earnestly desire to pray to God with my heart, yet I cannot!-I ſee my damnation, and I know my remedy is only in Chriſt, yet I cannot ſet myself to take hold of it.-Such are the punishments of the damned; they repent of the loss of heaven, but they cannot mend their ways.-As he was thus ſpeaking, he observed divers flies that came about him, and lighted on him: Behold! ſaid he, now also Beelzebub comes to his banquet; you ſhall ſhortly ſee my end! and in me, an example to many, of the justice and judgment of God!

About this time came in two Bishops, with divers Scholars of the University, one of them Paulus Vergerius. who having observed Spira more than any other, being continually conversant with him, told him, That his ſtate was ſuch, as rather ſtood in need of prayer than advice; and therefore desired him to pray with him in the Lord's prayer. Spira consented, and he began in the following manner.

"Our Father which art in heaven."

But Spira, breaking forth into tears, ſtopped. And they ſaid to him, It is well, your grief is a good ſign.-I bewail, ſaid Spira, my misery for I perceive I am forsaken of God, and cannot call to him from my heart, as I was wont to do.

Yet let us go on, ſaid Vergerius.

"Thy kingdome come."