Page:Awful memorial of the state of Francis Spira (1).pdf/16

[16] not ſuffer me to believe them, nor truſt in his mercy. What would you have me to do?- I would fain attain to this power, but cannot, tho' I ſhould prefently be burned for it.

But why do you, ſaid another, esteem this ſo great a ſin, whenas the learned Legate conſtrained you to it; which ſurely he would not have done if your former opinions be not erroneous? No, good Francis, the devil beſets thee; let not the grievouſneſs of any ſin amaze thee.

You ſay right, ſaid Spira, the devil hath poſſessed me, and G hath left me to his power; for I find I can neither believe the goſpel, nor truſt in G's mercy. I have ſinned againſt the Holy Ghoſt, and G, by his immutable decree, hath bound me over to perpetual puniſhment, without any hopes of pardon! It is true, the greatness of ſins, not the multitude of them, bind God's mercy; all thoſe ſins that in the former part of my life I have committed, then did not ſo much trouble me; for I trusted G would not lay them to my charge: but now, having sinned against the Holy Ghost, G hath taken away from me all power of repentance, and brings all my ſins to remembrance; and being guilty of one, I am guilty of all: AnndAnd [sic] therefore it is no matter whether in ſins be great or ſmall, few or many; they be ſuch as Chriſt's blood, nor G's mercy belongs not to me!-"God will have mercy on whom he will have mercy, and whom he will he hardeneth." This it is that gnaws my heart, he hath hardened me! and I find that he daily more and more doth harden me; and therefore I am out of hope!!! I tell you, there was never ſuch a monster as I am!-never was any man alive, ſuch a ſpectacle of exceeding misery!-I knew that my justification