Page:Awful memorial of the state of Francis Spira (1).pdf/14

[14] Chriſt came, ſaid they, to take away ſin, Rom. ii. 5. And calling for a book, they read unto him the paſſion of Chriſt, and coming to his nailing to the croſs, Spira ſaid, "This indeed is comfortable to ſuch as are elected; but as for me, wretch, they are nothing but grief and torment, becauſe I contemned them." Thus crying out with grief, and toſſing himſelf on a bed whereon he lay, he intreated them to read no more to him.

When Gribauldus came to ſee him, Vergerius ſaid to Spira, Dear Sir, here is Dr. Gribauldas, a godly and faithful friend of yours, come to ſee you. He is welcome, ſaid he, but he ſhall find me ill, Gribauldus replied, Sir, this is but an illuſion of the devil, who doth what he can to vex you; but turn you to G with your whole heart, and he is ready to ſhew you mercy.- The Lord, you know, is full of mercy; it is he that hath ſaid, "That as often as a ſinner ſhall repent of his ſin, he will remember his ſin no more." Conſider this in the example of Peter, that was Chriſt's familiar and apoſtle, who denied him thrice, and notwithſtanding all that, did not Chriſt ſhew mercy to him? Is the Lord's hand now ſhortened that it cannot ſave?

To this Spira anſwered, "If Peter grieved and repented, it was becauſe Chriſt locked on him with a merciful eye; and in that he was pardoned it was not becauſe he wept, but becauſe G was gracious to him. But G reſpects not me, and therefore I am a reprobate. I feel no comfort can enter into my heart; there is only place there for torments and vexings of ſpirit. I tell you my caſe is properly mine own; no man was ever in the like condition, and therefore my ſlate is fearful!"-Then roaring out in the