Page:Autobiography of an Androgyne 1918 book scan.djvu/66

36 approaching. The sensation was almost as painful as if I had been compelled to walk the streets naked. Until I reached my early thirties, I did not cease to regret being compelled to taboo feminine apparel, and was constantly being criticised by members of my family for choosing bright colors and as fancy apparel as a male can possibly wear. Androgynes have a predilection for such apparel, just as gynanders prefer the severely plain. Dress is one of the best signs by which to judge whether any suspected individual is or is not an invert. From the age of seven to twelve I occasionally masqueraded in a sister's dress, coquetting with my boy acquaintances the same as if I were physically a girl.

After reaching the age of seven, I abstained from fellatio on account of shame, as well as because I now habitually played with girls. Nevertheless, as just indicated, I was more crazy after the boys than any of my companions, and was a great flirt. When, promenading with a party of girls, we would encounter boys of our acquaintance, I would incite them to chase myself and the girls. With the girls I would discuss the merits of the various boys and name my favorites. The girls did not look upon me as a boy. Only one ever asked me to take the normal boy's part in coitus, and I answered naively and without embarrassment that I did not know how. My family would ridicule me for playing with the girls, but that did not stop it.

Up to the age of twelve I continued to tell my most intimate schoolmates to call me " Jennie," encouraged them to hug me, and right in the school-room reclined in