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166 I felt like one giddy with joy at the inspiration that had taken hold of me. Yes, Chotu would save me.

While still I was reflecting upon all that might or might not be, a servant came and handed me a card. What strange accident of fate was this? The doctor! my heart stood almost still; it was not joy that caused it, but amazement. I was like one in a trance when I told the servant to show him in. I was alone in the drawing-room, the only private apartment the house afforded. I had fled thither to be away from the curiosity and annoying remarks of friends.

Oh, that I knew what was the right thing for me to do. Was it then really proper that I should receive him? It was useless, however, for me to weigh the question further, for before me stood the doctor ere I had time for serious reflection.

"You appear very poorly, are you suffering still?" He said this almost immediately after entering.

I do not know whether there was the expression of any deep sympathy in these words, but they affected me deeply. It required great effort to suppress my tears