Page:All the Year Round - Series 2 - Volume 1.djvu/348

338[March 13, 1869] And the girl pressed her forehead with her hands and stood motionless.

"Yes, my dear," said the old lady, stretching out her hand, and drawing her daughter gently towards her. "I've thought more than once, that this house with its surroundings was scarcely the best school for a young girl who had to face poverty, and battle for her livelihood. And, indeed, I'm far from thinking that, even so far as I'm concerned, was it wise that we should originally have come here, or that we should have stayed so long. I wish you would propose about Mrs. Swainson's lodgings again, Marian, for"

"For Heaven's sake don't mention Mrs. Swainson's horrid lodgings again, mother. Are you tired of your visit here?"

"No, my dear, not in the least; I'm very happy, as happy as I ever expect to be again in this world, but I know there's such a thing as outstaying your welcome, and"

"Who has been putting such ideas into your head? Not those horrible girls! They have nothing to do with the arrangements of the house, they—there, I always lose my head when I think or speak of them!"

"You do indeed, Marian; I cannot imagine how it is that you and Maud and Gertrude don't get on together. You always seem to blaze up like I don't know what, especially you and Maud! No, my dear, the young ladies have always hoped we should stay on, but that of course is impossible, and"

"Perhaps not impossible, mother!"

"Why not, my dear? Do you think that?—oh no, thank you! I guess what you mean; I'm an old woman, I know, but I've still my faculties left, and I can see through a millstone as well as most people of my age, and though I'm not apt to be—I forget the word, but you know what I mean—I declare once for all I won't do it!"

"Won't do what, mother! I declare I have no notion what you mean."

"Oh yes you have, Marian. You heard what Dr. Osborne, whom I never could abide, but that's neither here nor there, suggested about my becoming Mrs. Caddy, or rather Mrs. Caddy's successor when she went. I'm sure you, who talk of having a spirit and a proper pride, ought to see that I couldn't do that! Your poor father wouldn't rest in his grave if he knew it! You remember he never would let me do anything with the boys' clothes, or hair brushes, or that, always would have a wardrobe woman, and now to think of my becoming a housekeeper"

"But, mother, there! you shall not worry yourself with that idea any more, and still we won't think just yet of Mrs. Swainson's nasty lodging! Kiss me now, and let me go! I've been keeping Mr. Creswell waiting full ten minutes."

What change had come over Marian Ashurst to cause her to speak in this way to her mother, with flushed cheek, and kindling eye, and elated look? What hope was dawning over the deep of that black, blank, sunless future, which she had seen before her in all its miserable intensity, its unavoidable dead level gloom, when first she arrived on a visit at Wolgreaves? What was the vision which during all that period, but especially since Tom Creswell's death, had haunted her, waking and sleeping, in company and in solitude, had been ever present to her thoughts, and had wrung her heart and disturbed her mental peace more keenly even than the thought of poverty, the desire for wealth? Dare she do it? She could, she had but little doubt of that, but little doubt of Mr. Creswell's daily increasing dependence on her, and regard for her. There was no one else in the world now, in whom he seemed to take the slightest interest. He had been deeply grieved at his son's death, laid up for weeks afterwards, one would have thought that life for him had lost all its zest and flavour, but lately in going through his business details with Marian, he had referred to the dead lad almost calmly, and had spoken of him, almost as he used to speak of him in the days, when his brusquerie and bad style, and consequent unpopularity, were gall and wormwood to his father's heart. She was thoroughly and entirely essential to him. He had told her so. He had said plainly enough that with no one else, no paid hirelings, no clerk, however trustworthy or confidentially employed, could he have gone through the private accounts, which showed the sources of his revenue and its investment, and which had dropped into almost hopeless confusion and arrear; from which they were only rescued by her quick apprehension, clear business knowledge, and indefatigable industry. He sat by in mute wonder, as she seized upon each point as it was laid before her, and stopped him in the midst of his verbose and clumsy explanation, to show how clearly she comprehended him, and how lightly she undertook the unravelment of matters