Page:Acharnians and two other plays (1909).djvu/70

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Come—step this way—No, nearer—in a whisper—

Nearer, I say—come, there now; tell me about it. [After listening with comic attention to a supposed whisper. Oh, bless me; what a capital, comical,

Extraordinary string of female reasons

For keeping a young bridegroom safe at home!

Well, we'll indulge her, since she's only a woman;

She's not obliged to serve; bring out the balsam!

Come, where's your little vial?—but I say—

Do you know the manner of it?—no, not you.

How should you, a girl like you! what; I must tell you?

Yes—and you'll tell the bride; she must observe:

When a ballot is on foot for foreign service;

At the hour of midnight, when he's fast asleep,

Then she must be particularly careful,

Without disturbing him, to anoint him. There!

(giving her back the vial).[Exit Bridesmaid.

Now take the balsam back, and bring me a funnel

To rack my wine off. I must mix my wine. Chorus. See yet another! posting here, it seems,

With awful tidings, anxious and aghast. Mess. Ho, Lamachus, I say! Lamachus, Ho!

Here's terror and tribulation, wars and woe! [Lamachus appears, probably with some appendage, to mark the interest which he had been taking in the culinary operations supposed to be going on behind the stage. Lam. What hasty summons shakes the castle gates? Mess. The generals have despatched an order to you

To muster your caparisons and garrisons,

And march to the mountain passes; there to wait

In ambush in the snow: for fresh advices

Have been received, with a credible intimation

Of a suspicion of an expedition

Of a marauding party from Bœotia. Lam. Generals! Aye, generals! the more the worse. Dic. Well, is not it hard that a man can't eat his dinner,

But he's to be disturbed and called from table,

With wars. and Lamachuses, and what not? Lam. You mock me. alas!