Page:AceticLibraryV2PreparationForDeath.djvu/151

 " made a lover of Thy goodness. That that day be already come, is my hope. I love Thee more than anything, and I prize Thy grace more than all the kingdoms of the world; rather than lose it, I would lose my life, if it were possible to do so, many times over, My God, for the love of Jesus Christ, give me holy perseverance until death, with Thy most holy love. Never allow me to betray Thee any more, neither to cease to love Thee.

Some will say, God has shown me so many mercies during the time that is past, that I hope He will continue to do so for the future. But I answer, for what reason has He shown you so many mercies? Is it because He wishes you to return and offend Him? Therefore, as S. Paul says, " Despisest thou the riches of His goodness, and forbearance, and long-suffering, not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance?" (Rom. ii. 4.) When thou art trusting in Divine mercy, if thou art not willing to put an end to thy sin, God will put an end to it for thee. " If a man will not turn, He will whet His sword." (Ps. vii. 13.) "To me belongeth vengeance and recompence." (Deut. xxxii. 35.) God waits, but when the time of revenge arrives, He will wait no longer; but He will then punish.

" And therefore will the Lord wait, that He may be gracious unto you." (Isa. xxx. 18.) God waits for the sinner that he may repent, but when He sees that he, to whom time is given to weep over his sins, only employs the time in increasing his sin, then He calls upon that same time to judge him. S. Gregory observes, " The time itself, comes to be judged." So that the very time that is given, the same mercies which have been shown, will only serve to make his punishment more severe, and his abandonment more quick. " We would have healed Babylon, but she is not healed: forsake her." (Jer. li. 9.) And how does God forsake the sinner? He sends death to him, or allows him to die in sin, or else deprives him of His abundant grace, and leaves him with that grace only which is sufficient for the sinner to be saved, but which the sinner will not make use of. The mind darkened, the heart hardened, the evil habit