Page:Abroad with Mark Twain and Eugene Field.djvu/83

 part, for a writer who sees no good in women confesses that he was found out by the sex he wars on and that the female of the species pronounced him n. g. before he had time to out-Ibsen the Norwegian. If I ever turn over a new leaf and beat Livy, bet your life I will have naught but honeyed words and sweet metaphor for the ladies. This fellow Strindberg's women are all compounds of vile ingredients—hideous hags with or without angel-faces—wife-beater Strindberg whipping dead mares. Well, to return to Schopenhauer (to me as incomprehensible as mutton) what's this?" (pointing to the word Tetragamy), "Hebrew or merely Yiddish?"

"Literally it means marrying a fourth wife." I examined the first page of the manuscript. "Seems to deal with conditions due to monogamy."

"Good," exclaimed Mark, "I have always wanted to reform monogamy, when my wife isn't looking. Now let's have the medicine straight."

"But," I said, "I can't do this long MS. justice here. The librarian will come in presently and you heard what he told us."

"Well," said Mark, "you sit down and copy the German while I cover you with my broad back. Should the librarian intrude, I will knock on the floor."

Accordingly, I copied those several pages, and afterwards made the translation Mark wanted. 79