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 and rather stiff, then the quieter you are, the better. You can admire generally but don't admire one object especially, for then courtesy requires your host to give it to you. Above all, in a house like this you should not seem to see any woman. To do so would be to insult her. If there is a modern sister who is brought in and introduced, be very formal indeed—at least until you are a very old friend and know what you are about and what the people in the house are like.

You may even be invited to a feast, probably in a restaurant or a hotel. If so, it is wise to eat only what is hot. Accept what cold food is put on your plate but do not eat it. It is always perfectly good manners not to eat at a Chinese feast. Besides, there will be many hot dishes so good that you cannot keep from eating them. If you have chopsticks, ask your host how to hold them. He will enjoy teaching you.

If the feast is a big one the rice will not come on until the end with four substantial dishes of meat and vege­tables to go with it—or even six. The dessert will be a sweet dish and will be served in the middle of the meal. The soup may come towards the end. Afterwards there will be tidbits of fruit and nuts to eat with the tea you will drink. Your chances of enjoying such a feast are not as good as they were before the war, of course. 17