Page:35 Sonnets by Fernando Pessoa.djvu/7



How can I think, or edge my thoughts to action, When the miserly press of each day’s need Aches to a narrowness of spilled distraction My soul appalled at the world’s work’s time-greed? How can I pause my thoughts upon the task My soul was born to think that it must do When every moment has a thought to ask To fit the immediate craving of its cue? The coin I’d heap for marrying my Muse And build our home i’th’ greater Time-to-be Becomes dissolved by needs of each day’s use And I feel beggared of infinity, Like a true-Christian sinner, each day flesh-driven By his own act to forfeit his wished heaven.

As a bad orator, badly o'er-book-skilled, Doth overflow his purpose with made heat, And, like a clock, winds with withoutness willed What should have been an inner instinct's feat; Or as a prose-wit, harshly poet turned, Lacking the subtler music in his measure, With useless care labours but to be spurned, Courting in alien speech the Muse's pleasure; I study how to love or how to hate, Estranged by consciousness from sentiment, With a thought feeling forced to be sedate Even when the feeling's nature is violent; As who would learn to swim without the river, When nearest to the trick, as far as ever.