Page:010 Once a week Volume X Dec 1863 to Jun 64.pdf/238

 ONCE A WEEK.

280

my life at first but in hand trembled when she

Such was



v

wa8

than all, that at the door which hid her from I stood p before my eyes. I could canvas, and found

,

For the first time for years brain no longer drowned of my Log The spiritual essence of my heart. g that had so long guided my arm deserted me, Celt that only the powerless clay re:

The blood How came this change I dreaded truth the me throat told my ?

I.

surging to I loved.

—

thought the horizon the clear, pure expanse in which my soul had toiled and dreamed, became a chaos a fire burned in my breast, and I tremThrough all that night I sat with my

With

this

still

my hands, and the first light upon the untouched picture found me more resolute. When she came I met her which

fell

at the door perhaps my looks alarmed her I do not know perhaps she guessed the truth. but she pressed my hand with the tenderest sympathy, and looked kindly into my eyes. I never thought her hand so soft, or her eyes so





iruL

Consider,

my

what

father,

I

was

—

.

a poor motherless student, trying to pick out bright tints from the world's colourless face sheltered so well under the shadow of poverty, that even my friends' eyes had forgotten to

—

look for me.

was the

It

I

What then was that first

touch of the beach to

the fainting swimmer ; the to the young mother ; the

the sick-bed.

Id to



smile worth

spoken word

first

first

It

breath of the

promised me for encouragement ;

for contempt,

Can you forgive That evening I found my-

for the cold wind, sunshine.

my fcelf

father?

at her



'

my

<lays passed

away before

was

I returned

and unhappy. when she drew her hand from mine I with a firm clasp, and prayed for ...

lit

fox

I

restless

of keeping it for ever ; yet at these ironld turn away with a little laugh,

and then bid

DM

'

wait.'

know

I

a .

Stranger still to of one who had

when

me

my

asked her

1

pointing to the picture, I

questioned

completed.

was

I

The to

1

Chad don<

before



th<

have

2<J,

1864.

for its



heightened, and

it

beauty spoke to

Still it was with a softer tenderness. to know its fate In my eagerness changed. 1^ did not wait until the colours dried, but despatched a messenger at once to the address In the which its purchaser had. left with me.

me

meantime

employed myself in preparing for

I

I disposed the light regulated the disorder of my room, force of a first impression, I covered tghe paintthis terrible reception.
 * and wishing, in my silly vanity, to study the

carefully,

Scarcely had I in this manner ing with a veil. laid the last offering on the altar of my idol, than I heard a step upon the stairs. I cannot tell

you

that I endured in the next few

all

moments

—my temples throbbed

I replied to the

knock

at

my

painfully,

and

door in a voice

husky with emotion. I had to repeat the words before my first and last patron heard me, and entered the room. He was a man of middle age and combined in his manner an appearance of hearty good humour with an air of unmisThe greeting he bestowed takable nobility. upon me was cordial and encouraging, and he asked in a loud cheerful voice, how my work had prospered. I replied that I intended and leaving that resolution to his judgment

as I placed

kindly, and severity. his seat

him

in a suitable light, he smiled assured me that I need not fear his

I

he

remember

also that as

said,

laughingly,

he took

The court

is

open/ "

my father, I weary you with these but you will forgive me when you remember that they express only the natural minuteness of a man who has little more to Perhaps,

details



observe and less to tell. At a reassuring glance from the generous face opposite me I drew aside the cloth hastily, as we snatch the iron from a wound, and casting my eyes on the ground, I waited. There ensued a few moments of profound silence a silence which my visitor was

—

the

first

to break.

" Is that face a conception of your own ? " The tone in which these words were uttered induced me to look up. The speaker had risen from his chair and had advanced towards the '

'

picture, in front of

which he stood,

pale, calm,

and motionless.

"

'

"

'

Is that face a conception of

No,

your own

'

?

signor.'

" You had "'lhad.' '

a model, doubtless

f

1

"

His eyes glanced rapidly round the room, again to the picture, and then from the picture to my face. My head sank before that impassible

!

more than ever

if possible,

was,



face buried in

[Feb.

—perhaps

glance.

I

shuddered, for this silence After a long pause the

seemed terrible to me. calm voice spoke again.