Nine Inch Will Please a Lady

Come rede me, dame, come tell me, dame, My dame, come tell me truly, What length o' graith, when weel ca'd hame, Will ser'e a woman duly? The carlin clew her wanton tail, Her wanton tail sae ready; I learn't a sang in Annandale, Nine inch will please a lady.

But for a countrie cunt like mine, In sooth we're nae sae gentle; We'll tak' twa thumb-bread to the nine, And that's a sonsie pintle. O leeze me on my Charlie lad! I'll ne'er forget my Charlie! Twa roarin' handfu' and a daud, He nidg't it in fu' rarely.

But weary fa' the laithern doup, And may it ne'er ken thrivin'; It's no the length that gars me loup, But it's the double drivin'. Come nidge me Tam, come nodge me Tam, Come nidge me o'er the nyvle; Come louse and lug your batterin' ram, And thrash him at my gyvel.